Christmas has always been my favorite holiday. I love everything about it. Anticipation, excitement, picking out the right gift, enjoying family, etc. However, I have to say that the last few years have left little to look forward to next year. Let's just say that I need to rethink how I will approach Christmas holidays in the future. My children are grown now and do not hold the same excitement for the Christmas holidays as I do. Christmas has turned into more of a frustration with each passing year. I had hoped to "make memories" and continue traditions; however, after the last 4 Christmas's, it is painfully evident that it will not. I have to accept it and begin a new tradition for myself. I'm thinking vacation time. A cruise maybe. Something other than spending a fortune on gifts not appreciated, arguements over getting together, vastly amounts of money spent on food that ends up down the drain. I think that I will treasure each time my oldest daughter allows me to have my grandchildren and make memories that way. I will buy presents for them then, and have Christmas several times throughout the year. Sounds awesome to me. To make things worse, my youngest daughter recieved devastating news on December 28. I'm not ready to post anything about this, but this has definately destroyed the holiday spirit. As I'm posting this, I know that most people are thinking about the year past, and being hopeful for the future and the aniticipation of what the new year brings. We already know that this year will bring sorrow. All I can do is pray that God has mercy on my youngest daughter, and leaves little decisions for her to make as she is agonizing on what to do. For the first time in my life, I am really dreading a new year.